Black Coffee: Shoplifting Tips, Poor Financial Decisions & Schweddy Balls

It’s time to sit back, relax and enjoy a little joe…

Welcome to another rousing edition of Black Coffee, your off-beat weekly round-up of what’s been going on in the world of money and personal finance. Here’s what caught my attention over the past week…

Let’s get right to it this week.

Blogs I’ve Been Following This Week

Squirrelers – Can Long Hours of Work Be Deadly? The Wise Squirrel discusses new research that shows people who work 11 or more hours per day are more likely to get heart disease. There’s a nugget of good news however: those of you putting in 11-hour workdays can significantly reduce your risk of heart attack by clocking out a minute early.

Life and My Finances – Is Cash Still King? I’m Starting to Have My Doubts. It used to be you could flash a wad of bills at any salesman and they would instantly drop the price of whatever they were selling by 10 percent or more. That’s no longer guaranteed. I’m not sure why either. Thankfully, Derek points out a few places where people with cash are still treated like royalty.

Bruce Bucks – Pack Up Your Debt and Travel. Says Matt: “I go through phases where I get tired of always making the right decision.” You know, some guys just have all the luck. According to the Honeybee, I haven’t made a correct decision about anything since 1996.

Afford Anything – How I Lost Money with a Bank CD. Speaking of bad decisions, check out the big mistake Paula made when she decided to buy a bank CD. I know. How in the world does anybody lose money on an “ultra-secure” bank CD? Well, Paula did. (And the Honeybee thinks I have problems.)

And Here’s Some Other Posts You Might Enjoy…

Money Crashers – How to Refinance a Home Mortgage

The College Investor – FHA Loan Limits May Drop on October 1

Wealth Pilgrim – Choosing  A  School  —  How  Smart  People  Do  It

The Penny Hoarder – How  to  Make  $750  a  Month  Selling  Used  Books.

Thousandaire – My Definition of Rich

Financially Poor – Would You Give This Cheap Christmas Gift Idea?

Free From Broke – 9 Things to Do When You Retire

The Way-Back Machine: Past Posts Of Mine You May Have Missed

From December 2009:

The Top 10 Reasons Why I Love (and Hate) My Credit Cards – I wrote this article for a contest. No, I didn’t win. (Darn it.)

Credits and Debits

Debit: The Senate, using an arcane legislative procedure borne from the August debt ceiling agreement, raised the national credit card limit by another half-trillion dollars on Thursday. The debt ceiling now sits at $15.19 trillion. And the wheels on the bus go round and round.

Debit: Never mind our children and grandchildren, Big Government and its insatiable need for the additional cash required to keep it afloat will soon be adversely affecting all of us.

Debit: Meanwhile, President Obama unveiled a $447 billion jobs bill in a speech to another joint session of Congress on Thursday. Hopefully this proposal will be more effective at creating jobs than the last one.

Credit: Okay. I’m probably being too harsh on the president. According to the White House’s Council of Economic Advisers, the Recovery Act “saved or created” about 3 million jobs.

Debit: Too bad that comes to $262,333 for every new job. I know.

Debit: And that’s assuming all 3 million of those jobs were “created,” as opposed to “saved.” Otherwise the cost per job is even more.

Debit: Hey, don’t look at me; I’m still trying to figure how a “saved” job qualifies as “stimulus.”   That’s kind of like claiming you swam to shore when, in fact, all you really did was tread water.

Debit: Then again, other economists are claiming that the original stimulus actually created/saved only 450,000 government jobs — while simultaneously destroying/forestalling one million jobs in the private sector. That’s a net loss of over one-half million jobs.

Credit: Although I’m not advocating this, I think the economy would probably be better off if we just equally divide the $447 billion among every American. That’s roughly $1500 for every man, woman, and child.

Credit: In other news, a Mississippi man was arrested after allegedly being caught absconding with a veritable bounty in his pants consisting of two bags of jumbo shrimp, a pork loin, and … two live lobsters. That kind of gives new meaning to being pinched for shoplifting, doesn’t it?

Credit: I’ve heard of people with crabs in their pants, but never live lobsters.

Credit: One thing the police didn’t find in the alleged shoplifter’s pants were Schweddy Balls. Hey, now; that’s the newest ice cream flavor from Ben & Jerry’s.

Credit: By the way, after being confronted by employees — presumably with the line, “Is that a pork loin in your pants or are you just happy to see us?” — the alleged shoplifter apparently tried to kick-start a hasty escape by throwing the purloined pork at employees. (I’ve got nothing to add to that; consider it a visual gag.)