Original oil painting by: Grandfather’s wife
Grandfather likes the funny epitaphs he’s seen.
But he tries to have fun beforehand, because it’s better than being morose.
When he orders pizza, he tells the clerk to charge his credit card now so she’ll get paid in case he dies before he can pick up the pizza and he tells doctor’s offices he’ll tell them right away if he dies before his next appointment.
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About the Author: RD Blakeslee is an octogenarian from West Virginia who built his net worth by only investing in that which can be enjoyed during acquisition and throughout life, as opposed to papers in a drawer, like stocks and bonds. You can read more about him here.
Photos: Courtesy of the Blakeslee Family
This reminds me of a man named Odd. He hated his name, so prior to his death he told his wife not to put his name on his headstone. Being faithful, she only put his birth and death dates on his stone. To this day people walk through the cemetery, see a stone with only birth and death dates and no name, and say, “that’s Odd.”
Next to Odd was buried a lady named “Even”.
Strollers said “That’s even odder”.
Eek! Grandfather, you crack me up.
Around these parts we don’t talk about death, either. We only refer to “if I get hit by a bus.” Luckily, we live in the country where there are no buses.
When I get through talking with a customer service rep here and there, they usually ask: “Is there anything else I can do for you today”
“Yes. Could you please take ten years off my age?”
Merchant in NYC (where else?): “We only offer that on Sunday and We’re closed Sunday”.
HaHa! When a waiter/waitress asks me if there’s anything else they can bring, I always respond, “A winning lotto ticket.”
LOL! I’m going to steal that one, Carolyn!
As Grandfather gets old, the “next steps” in his life come to mind and he thinks (there’s that word, again) about them.
For example, he has no idea where his great grandparents are buried (as was the fashion in that day) and finds that nobody he’s asked so far does either.
Have you asked the internet? I did some family geneology a decade or two ago, and got wonderful help. Now, tho, the help may be even better – but then they inundate you with spam. Fair warning. That’s your price.
Thanks, Gee.
No I haven’t mentioned it publicly, anywhere but here.
Broader-based answer not worth the price …
Grandfather enjoys what he calls his “Life of the Mind”. Early each day, before the Wife is up, he just sits and thinks.
“Great Thoughts”? Who knows.
He believes, however, that what he thinks about defines him.