{"id":72100,"date":"2022-04-14T04:15:43","date_gmt":"2022-04-14T11:15:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lenpenzo.com\/blog\/?p=72100"},"modified":"2022-04-18T07:40:23","modified_gmt":"2022-04-18T14:40:23","slug":"grandfather-says-the-early-birds","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lenpenzo.com\/blog\/id72100-grandfather-says-the-early-birds.html","title":{"rendered":"Grandfather Says: The Early Birds"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"attachment_43685\" style=\"width: 385px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/lenpenzo.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/grandfather.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-43685\" class=\"wp-image-43685\" src=\"https:\/\/lenpenzo.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/grandfather-758x1024.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"375\" height=\"507\" srcset=\"https:\/\/lenpenzo.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/grandfather-758x1024.jpg 758w, https:\/\/lenpenzo.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/grandfather-222x300.jpg 222w, https:\/\/lenpenzo.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/grandfather-768x1037.jpg 768w, https:\/\/lenpenzo.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/grandfather.jpg 1014w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 375px) 100vw, 375px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-43685\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Original oil painting by: Grandfather&#8217;s wife<\/p><\/div>\n<p>The following is a true story, only names are changed to protect the guilty.<\/p>\n<p>Grandfather used to be visited by Clyde and his wife Penelope, from time to time. They always showed up early, before Grandfather was ready for them and Grandfather had to yell from the bedroom: &#8220;I&#8217;ll be out in a minute.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Grandfather decided to remedy that.<\/p>\n<p>So, the next time they showed up early, grandfather yelled from the bedroom as usual but, this time, he came out in his bathrobe.<\/p>\n<p>Grandfather strode into full frontal position before Penelope and, as she squealed &#8220;No! No! No!&#8221; he flung open his bathrobe, showing her &#8230;<\/p>\n<p>His Bermuda shorts and tee shirt.<\/p>\n<p>It worked; they didn&#8217;t come early, anymore.<\/p>\n<p>***<\/p>\n<p><em>About the Author: RD Blakeslee is a nonagenarian in West Virginia who built his net worth by only investing in that which can be enjoyed during acquisition and throughout life, as opposed to papers in a drawer, like stocks and bonds. You can read more about him <a href=\"https:\/\/lenpenzo.com\/blog\/id22017-how-i-live-on-less-than-40000-annually-ralph-from-west-virginia.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">here<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: right;\"><span style=\"font-size: smaller;\">Photos: Courtesy of the Blakeslee Family<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The following is a true story, only names are changed to protect the guilty. Grandfather used to be visited by Clyde and his wife Penelope, from time to time. They always showed up early, before Grandfather was ready for them and Grandfather had to yell from the bedroom: &#8220;I&#8217;ll be out in a minute.&#8221; Grandfather [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":150,"featured_media":52358,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mo_disable_npp":"","pmpro_default_level":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[490,459],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-72100","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-grandfather-says","8":"category-family","9":"pmpro-has-access","10":"entry"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v22.8 (Yoast SEO v27.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Grandfather Says: The Early Birds<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/lenpenzo.com\/blog\/id72100-grandfather-says-the-early-birds.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Grandfather Says: The Early Birds\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"The following is a true story, only names are changed to protect the guilty. 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